A Man With the Guts to Take a Stand Against Domestic Violence
The role of men taking a stand against domestic violence is not commonly discussed in our culture, but Jackson Katz brings this issue to the forefront in his truly moving TED Talk.
Sadly, the fight for equality has become unpopular in recent times. Women who stand up for their rights are told to stop whinging; that they already have equality. As we well know, this is a far cry from the truth in a culture that is ever more subtle in it’s discrimination.
Jackson Katz covers some key points on the subject of gender issues, including the socialisation of men, sexual abuse, and a fascinating insight into how even our use of the English language successfully shifts our focus from a perpetrator’s wrongdoing to blaming an innocent victim.
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What should I do, besides report it to the police, if I see a woman (or anyone) being physically abused in public? In what ways should I help?
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It’s deeply painful to see human beings fighting and exploiting each other in such horrific ways. And we see that it is provoked mostly by the men, the ones who are supposed to be the strong ones.
In reality, the strong ones are those who choose compassion and kindness. It takes much more strenght and wisdom to make peace, than to take frustrations out on someone else.
It is unfortunate that compassion and kindness in men is seen as a weakness even in today’s world.
It is my wish that we as a species are one day able to collectively adopt values of compassion and kindness towards all. It is the only way. It starts with just one (hu)man standing up for love to have an impact.
Let us all stand together and be supported by the strength of our numbers to promote loving values. Let us stand for domestic kindness instead.
Beautifully put, thank you for your insightful comment.
In regards to your question, I don’t have a good answer for you. I think it depends on the situation. Obviously, you need to consider your own safety. In the past, I’ve jumped between a female friend and a random guy who was trying to assault her, only to have him come at me instead. While I felt as though it was the ‘right’ thing to do ethically, it certainly wasn’t the safest or the smartest choice as it put both my safety at risk and risked angering the aggressor further – generally not a good idea unless you are strong enough to restrain the aggressor! Most times when I have been in this situation. My natural instinct is to protect those close to me regardless of my own physical safety, but when I don’t know the people involved, I’ve sought help rather than becoming directly physically involved in the altercation. This is just my personal choice based on concern for my own safety, which could very well change if I were larger in stature and/or more skilled in self-defense which would increase my likelihood of being able to restrain an aggressor with less risk to myself and those around me. It may be very different for you.
Great question 🙂